Episode 5

  • Vicki is either a season regular in Ben’s life or a vampire and Ben gets deleted.
  • Mr. Internet tells Vicki she can’t get on and off trams anymore because her leg is drunk.
  • Vicki has a crush on someone and she’ll never tell you who.
  • Vicki failed to find a delicate balance in her medication and nearly hits a ghost in her car.
  • Ben is so manly he grows stubble on his hands.
  • Vicki’s crush’s name isn’t Tallulah.
  • Vicki tells you who.
  • “I’ll take a dump on his head, while he’s sleeping”.
  • “Why don’t you like me?”
  • Ben’s dad thinks he’s Steven Spielberg.
  • ‘Right leg slave’ and ‘left leg slave’ apologise for a lack of ice.
  • We attempt to set the Desert Bus world record.
  • Tootiquette: 2 beeps either means “move it idiot” or “you’re super cute”.
  • Vicki’s ransom is set at 60 cents.
  • Why can’t breath testing work on the honesty system?
  • Vicki’s dad puts on his business socks.
  • Vicki does NOT like it when people underline certain words in sentences.
  • Chocolate is to women as boobies is to men.
  • Awkward questions: They’re not for me, I just killed a guy…
  • New Zealand girls: Six packs or sex packs?
  • New Zealand’s new tourism campaign: “You could die there”.
  • The greatest headline ever.
  • Why Coles should employ the ‘not cute enough rule’.
  • “Ah…get off my face!”, “Even if you’re not gay, that sounds interesting”.
  • Vicki hangs out in an oven with a giant spoon.
  • Weird messages: Your name’s Suzie, do you wanna go out?
  • We trap girls on busses and don’t even use our scintillating peanut conversation.
  • Secret girlfriends and accidental wives: “My relationships never get too clingy”, “Because they don’t get anywhere”.
  • A message to any ugly people in Vicki’s office: “Don’t sit near the entrance, someone may see you!”

 

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